Okay everybody, look at me — 1, 2, 3, say cheese!”
It’s the universal language of photographing our kids. If you’re anything like me, your parents probably put you through this routine thousands of times. And just like most kids, you probably froze up, felt awkward, and muttered under your breath: “Not Dad with his camera again — can’t we just enjoy ourselves?”
The truth is, this is how millions of us learned to take photos — staged, stiff, and disconnected. And it’s no surprise that so many of those images end up looking posed, bored, and lifeless. They don’t capture what the day actually felt like.
But why do we take photos in the first place? What are we really trying to capture?
If you’re still trying to decide which camera is the best for family photography then I’ve written a separate article on that.
For me, yes — I want a record of their childhood, the trips we took, the little milestones. There’s nothing wrong with that at all. In fact, my wife covers most of those shots perfectly with her phone.
What I really want from my photography is something deeper: to capture my daughters’ character, their quirks, their growth — to create photos that will let me look back years from now and feel what they were like. I want images that remind me just how special this time in their life really is.
At first, though, I followed the usual playbook: “Look at me, Sofia. Smile!” And I got the usual results — technically fine photos that were instantly forgettable. Or in one memorable case, unforgettable for all the wrong reasons — what should have been a quick passport photo session turned into an hour-long ordeal that ended in frustration and tears. Sofia was upset too 😁
That and experience taught me that when we force kids to pose, we remove their true character, and force them to act in a way that doesn’t show them how they really are. Yes, we get a record shot of a frustrated child but thats about it.
To really capture Sofia and Isobelle, I carry a camera with me whenever we go somewhere. To make sure I’m always ready I take time to learn the camera so that it becomes second nature. I set the camera up to capture those moments with as little fuss as possible and then, most importantly, I have learned to let them do their own thing, to enjoy the places that we go to and simply be themselves. This freedom to enjoy themselves without dad annoying them with his camera allows me to actually use my camera to peek in to their world and capture authentic slices of it that results in far more compelling and emotionally resonant photos.
They’re now so used to me having a camera with me and pointing it at them that they simply let me get on with it as it doesn’t intrude into whatever it is that they are doing. Isobelle wondering where on earth we are, Sofia diving into the swimming pool or enjoying snow for the first time. Never posed, just me, ready with my camera to shoot what is already in front of me.
So if I have learned anything in my time as a parent and a photographer, its to let the World unfold in front of you and it has a way of revealing it’s beauty without needing to force things. You just have to open your eyes and see it.
Wise words.
Thanks.